When thinking of a suitable name for my 900th blogpost, the late hip hop producer The 45 King’s song “The 900 Number” immediately came to mind. It’s a classic beat that has been sampled by many artists such as DJ Kool on the track “Let Me Clear My Throat.”
DJ Kool’s version featured Doug E. Fresh and the late Biz Markie, two classic emcees who I used to listen to on the regular in the late 80s and early 90s. For the record, to this day, “Nobody Beats the Biz.” Yet, I digress.
For those who either don’t recall or who weren’t alive prior to public release of the Internet in 1993, 900 numbers were a popular form of entertainment and information-dissemination for many people According to one source:
Premium rate services are dialed in the format 1-900-XXX-XXXX. This is often called a 900 number or a 1 900 number (“one-nine-hundred”). A call to a 900-number can result in high per-minute or per-call charges. For example, a “psychic hotline” may charge US $2.99 for the first minute and US $0.99 for each additional minute.
900 numbers were fashionable when telephones had cords attached to them – something else many people have either forgotten or weren’t alive to recall. When thinking of “The 900 Number” and “Let Me Clear My Throat,” I now consider how I utilize by blog.
Unlike the once trendy 900 numbers of yesteryear, whereby people consented to paying a relatively high price for novelty phone calls, I clear my throat (so to speak) in regard to mental, emotional, and behavioral health issues through blogposts offered to the world free of charge.
Admittedly, my posts don’t receive much engagement. And with this fact, I remain content. After around post 200 or 300, I altogether stopped caring whether or not anyone saw what I wrote. Therefore, I freed myself of ego in this regard.
This wasn’t always the case. Back when the social media platform MySpace was popular, I used my profile to post blog content. The more social engagement I generated, the more I wrote for the audience and the less I drafted in the interest of free expression.
Transitioning from that medium to Facebook, I continued posting provocative content. Using that forum, I behaved poorly when engaging in online arguments about matters I can no longer recall at present. Apparently, whatever I had to say wasn’t all that important after all.
I then transferred my focus to Instagram, posting lengthy blog entries at a time when people were initially posting photos of what they ate for lunch, images depicting men and their gym gains, and photos of scantily clad women with pseudo-inspirational quotes. (Do people still do that?)
I left behind social media long ago. Conclusively, I didn’t like how I acted, didn’t enjoy reading the content of other people’s minds, and wasn’t fond of pressuring myself to draft content I thought other people would want to read instead of posting from a place of authenticity.
I essentially gave up writing until a friend of mine encouraged me to start a behavioral health blog. I hesitated until a supervisor (at the time) invited me to write a post for his blog. After I submitted it, he approved it, and then he reneged on an agreement to post it, I began my blog.
Since then, I’ve been writing and posting fairly regularly. I never imagined I’d post 900 entries, yet here I am. Although the overwhelming majority of my content isn’t read by others (with exception of bots), I occasionally receive positive, negative, and neutral feedback from people.
Over all, I’ve been given critical responses. Throughout my blog, I’ve openly discussed how people have told me that my writing is unclear, said I use poor grammar, expressed that my work is contrived, and they’ve communicated other indicators of ineptitude. I can’t say that I fully disagree with such commentary.
Admittedly, I’m a fallible human being who never set out to become a writer or blogger. I barely graduated high school. So perhaps more than anyone else in this world, I understand how inefficient the quality of my writing is. Truly, I’m not a gifted writer.
All the same, I accept myself unconditionally. Similarly, and without conditions, I accept other people. Equally important, I unconditionally accept life. Although I’m not lousy, my writing is at times atrocious. I make many mistakes and I communicate my thoughts clumsily. I accept that.
Still, on rare occasions, people contact me and express gratitude for the content I’ve posted within my blog. Recently, someone from the United Kingdom (UK) contacted me and thanked me for a Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT) entry I posted in regard to COVID-19.
The individual expressed the perception of having been gaslit by others about the worldwide response to the virus, as my post apparently helped the person in some meaningful way. Joy stemming from comments like that is valued for the fleeting experience it represents.
All things shall pass, including joy associated with a pleasant blog compliment. Aside from positive and negative engagement, I’ve mostly received neutral feedback about my posts. Early on, I drafted posts and invited clients to read material I thought would benefit them.
However, it turns out that the response I mostly received in this regard was that of a “meh” variety. “Oh yeah, I read that,” a client would say, “thank you for sharing.” Alas, I mostly stopped sharing blogposts with those who have little interest in psychoeducation.
Therefore, when it’s time to “let me clear my throat,” I’m mostly writing to clear my mind. I appreciate being able to psychologically grapple with different concepts and allow the world to access my thoughts without having to pay for the inarticulate manner in which my mind works.
As previously mentioned, I didn’t care much for reading the thoughts of other people when I actively participated in the social media experience. Accordingly, I don’t blame anyone for not wanting exposure to how I cognitively tangle or disentangle subject matter.
Contemplating this topic further, using a hip hop lens to focus my thoughts, I consider the song “2nd Childhood,” from the album Stillmatic (2001), by the classic lyricist Nas. Personally, the BlueGrassPedro remix is the superior version of the song, as it features a Biz Markie sample.
A mixed verse on the track states, “When I flow for the street, who else could it be?” Such is my approach to this blog. I draft for the world. Who else could it be, other than an incredibly flawed psychotherapist who seeks to help people get better than to merely feel better? It’s me!
Blogging has been an interesting experience, writing and posting, revisiting content, changing my mind, rewriting and reposting, and so forth and so on. I’m 900 blogposts in and have no idea when I’ll stop writing and posting.
What I do know is that when I clear my throat I want to say something worthwhile. With hope, what I have to say contributes to the improved functioning and quality of life for at least one person. Alas, herein, I’ve shared an example of one such person in the UK.
For me, that’s a good enough standard. Mission accomplished! Sincerely, I can contently go to my grave. (Let that be known.) No longer do I engage in pointless arguments online. As well, there’s no more catering to my ego. That was always a pointless endeavor.
Rather, now I know that I’ve helped at least one person. Knowledge of this sort isn’t prideful. Instead, it’s within my interest and has served as a goal of mine to help others during my latter years. There’s no 900 number needed for this sort of assistance. Thus, I offer my blog for free.
If you’re looking for a provider who works to help you understand how thinking impacts physical, mental, emotional, and behavioral elements of your life, I invite you to reach out today by using the contact widget on my website.
As the world’s foremost old school hip hop REBT psychotherapist, I’m pleased to help people with an assortment of issues from anger (hostility, rage, and aggression) to relational issues, adjustment matters, trauma experience, justice involvement, attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder, anxiety and depression, and other mood or personality-related matters.
At Hollings Therapy, LLC, serving all of Texas, I aim to treat clients with dignity and respect while offering a multi-lensed approach to the practice of psychotherapy and life coaching. My mission includes: Prioritizing the cognitive and emotive needs of clients, an overall reduction in client suffering, and supporting sustainable growth for the clients I serve. Rather than simply helping you to feel better, I want to help you get better!
Deric Hollings, LPC, LCSW
References:
Aarontrini85. (2010, January 9). Biz Markie - Nobody Beats the Biz (Marley Marl remix) [Video]. YouTube. Retrieved from https://youtu.be/3hbxvsrFLaw?si=S1X7_65-JCHt8ncC
Deejayfrom88. (2016, January 4). The 45 King- the 900 number-Original mix [Video]. YouTube. Retrieved from https://youtu.be/f4aFDaFWHrY?si=qjeDoLZUlrjsXvDq
Hollings, D. (2024, July 21). A spring of hope. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/a-spring-of-hope
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