I chose to study Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT) in graduate school for counseling due to a number of reasons. One justification for my decision was that at the time I was in school this psychotherapeutic modality was evidence-based in regard to the treatment and management of anger-related issues.
Prior to learning of, committing to, and frequently practicing REBT, I experienced some degree of behavioral impairment that correlated with anger. In particular, I was quite familiar with rage, hostility, aggression, and violence.
Therefore, I wanted to learn of a self-help modality that afforded me an opportunity to work on my impairment without needing assistance of a psychotherapist. In this regard, REBT functions from a humanistic perspective and values the ability of people to address their own issues.
Years following my grad school experience, REBT continues to maintain evidential support for addressing anger-related issues. Before going any further, it may be helpful to clarify what I mean when discussing anger. According to the American Psychological Association, anger is:
[A]n emotion characterized by tension and hostility arising from frustration, real or imagined injury by another, or perceived injustice. It can manifest itself in behaviors designed to remove the object of the anger (e.g., determined action) or behaviors designed merely to express the emotion (e.g., swearing).
Anger is distinct from, but a significant activator of, aggression, which is behavior intended to harm someone or something. Despite their mutually influential relationship, anger is neither necessary nor sufficient for aggression to occur.
Arguably, there are six basic emotions: joy, fear, anger, sorrow, disgust, and surprise. As such, anger is a naturally-occurring emotion. Moreover, there’s no logical or reasonable (collectively “rational”) justification for villainizing this innate feeling.
Despite being a normal emotion, I’m aware of how a number of people categorize anger as a negative emotion. For the sake of argument, suppose I grant this premise. I then invite you to consider whether or not there are healthy versus unhealthy negative emotions.
For instance, if someone murders the person you most love in this world, would anger be a rational and healthy negative emotion to consequently experience? Perhaps it all depends on what other consequences accompany this natural emotion (i.e., behavioral response).
Providing a bit more nuance to this matter, consider that REBT theory addresses how people can exacerbate the effects of anger through use of unproductive assumptions. To better understand how this occurs, consider the following information.
REBT theory uses the ABC model to illustrate how when Activating events (“Actions”) occur and people maintain irrational Beliefs about the events, these unhelpful assumptions – and not the actual occurrences – are what create unpleasant cognitive, emotive, bodily sensation, and behavioral Consequences.
In particular, there are four predominate irrational beliefs which people use: demandingness, awfulizing, low frustration tolerance, and global evaluations. Addressing these, the ABC model incorporates Disputation of unhelpful assumptions in order to explore Effective new beliefs.
From a psychological standpoint, people disturb themselves using a Belief-Consequence (B-C) connection. Of course, this isn’t to suggest that in the context of the naturalistic or physical world there is no Action-Consequence (A-C) connection.
As an example, if someone shoots your loved one in the heart with a bullet (Action), your loved one may die (Consequence). Still, if you unhelpfully Believe, “That shouldn’t have happened,” then you’ll likely disturb yourself into a rageful disposition (Consequence).
Noteworthy, I help people to stop upsetting themselves through use of B-C connections, though I can’t fully resolve their A-C connections. Likewise, I’d be less concerned with anger in regard to the aforementioned example than what behavioral consequence may follow.
This is where I separate anger from rage, hostility, aggression, and violence. Because anger is a normal emotion, I see little utility in practicing denial in the lad-back fashion of self-deceit by shrugging and concluding, “Oh well, my loved one was murdered. I guess shit happens.”
It’s okay to admit to oneself when a virtue such as justice has been violated. Understandably, you may be angry as a result of your belief about someone having murdered a loved one. Still, how might you behave as a consequence of that belief?
If in an angry state you seek out the murderer and with rageful violence you exact revenge by murdering the person you believe has wronged you, this is the sort of B-C self-disturbance I think REBT may be useful at addressing. Expanding upon this level of unproductive anger, one source states:
Effective therapy for anger begins by acknowledging that something has occurred that is unfavorable to you. It also starts with identifying the unproductive aspects of your personal reaction to the unfavorable situation. It also distinguishes between an unhealthy anger response and a healthy and productive anger response. You will not be motivated to respond to unfavorable circumstances with healthy anger unless you see how your unhealthy angry response is interfering with you productively dealing with the obstacle or injustice you have encountered.
Although you may be tempted to seek vengeance, unproductive behavior may not best serve your interests and goals. For instance, suppose you value your freedom. Murdering someone won’t bring back a deceased loved one and such behavior could deprive you of freedom if sentenced to incarceration.
At around the time I began learning of REBT in grad school, I worked in a criminal justice diversion program. I visited with many people in jails and who were on their way to prison for having allowed B-C connections to influence unhealthy negative emotional behavior.
Most of the clientele with whom I worked told me they lamented not knowing about REBT prior to having committed crimes which deprived them of freedom. Within some of those clients I saw a shadow of my former self.
The main difference between them and I was that they were caught and prosecuted for criminal acts whereas I wasn’t. Thus, it was imperative that I continued the cognitive behavior therapy techniques incorporated into REBT so that I wouldn’t allow self-disturbance to result in a similar outcome.
Interestingly, years after first learning of REBT, I was introduced to the concept of righteous indignation. Describing this form of anger, one source states:
Righteous indignation, also called righteous anger, is anger that is primarily motivated by a perception of injustice or other profound moral lapse. It is distinguished from anger that is prompted by something more personal, like an insult.
In some Christian doctrines, it is considered the only form of anger which is not sinful. According to these doctrines, an example of righteous anger would be when Jesus drove the money lenders out of the temple (Matthew 21:12–13).
In the previous ABC model example, I intentionally illustrated the death of a loved one. Still, I realize how non-impactful this vague descriptor is at actually evoking beliefs which influence emotions and behavior.
Also, being that I practice REBT on a daily basis and have built up resilience to many B-C effects, I’ll now transition from use of you in an example and imagine myself as having experienced the murder of a loved one. In particular, I’ll draw upon my past experience as a stepdad.
There was a time when I helped raise a child from six months after her birth until the week of her fifth birthday. I loved her dearly. Therefore, I’ll use her memory in an example whereby use of the ABC model could impact the consequence of my beliefs.
Since trigger warnings are essentially useless, I won’t mentally prepare you for exposure to my example. For a period of time during my undergraduate studies, I examined literature associated with serial killers.
Among the most disturbed I came across was Albert Fish who died in 1936. Noteworthy, I recognize that Fish was a fallible human being just as each and every other individual is imperfect. Thus, I don’t view him as bad or evil, though you may disagree with my outlook.
On one occasion, after murdering and eating a 10-year-old girl, Fish wrote to the victim’s mother and stated the following:
First I stripped her naked. How she did kick – bite and scratch. I choked her to death, then cute her in small pieces so I could take my meat to my rooms. Cook and eat it. How sweet and tender her little ass was roasted in the oven. It took me 9 days to eat her entire body. I did not fuck her tho I could of had I wished. She died a virgin.
While I don’t believe Fish was a bad or evil individual, I undoubtedly consider his behavior to have been repugnant. When testing the capacity of my resolve through personal practice of REBT, I imagine receiving word that a serial killer did to my stepdaughter what Fish did to the aforementioned girl.
From childhood till early adulthood, I would’ve exacted revenge for far less than Fish’s behavior. Besides, I’m no stranger to rage, hostility, aggression, and violence. In earlier years, I’d have done unmentionable things to someone like Fish.
Nevertheless, I realized at some point that my belief-driven reaction to situations wasn’t representative of healthy negative emotion. In fact, regarding a number of instances, the unproductive aspects of my personal reaction to the unfavorable situations were far worse than the initial activating events.
Now that I practice REBT on a daily basis, I view the Fish and stepdaughter example through the lens of rationality. Rather than rage, hostility, aggression, and violence, I currently perceive that righteous indignation would result.
Elaborating on this topic, one source suggests that behavior associated with rage is aggressive, condemnatory, and tends not to serve interests and goals. Behavior associated with righteous indignation is assertive, unapproving of the action, though doesn’t fracture interests and goals.
If I learned that someone like Fish murdered and ate my former stepdaughter, I believe I could keep the proverbial monster inside of me at bay. Expanding on how I consider this a virtuous outcome, in a blogpost entitled Hulk, I stated:
To me, one who’s worthy of admiration in this context is the person who is born with, or perhaps created through environmental influence, the capacity for enacting violence and aggression though who chooses peace over extreme force. It’s the individual who overcomes one’s own struggle that I think is worthy of acclaim.
When discussing righteous indignation in this manner, what comes to mind? I imagine some people may be disgusted by beliefs about how I likely wouldn’t go on a murderous rampage if someone harmed my loved one in a manner described herein.
After all, a number of people to whom I’ve introduced REBT have merely justified their anger. Given rationale about the appropriateness of a rageful, hostile, aggressive, or violent response, what behavior couldn’t be justified? Regarding this matter, one source states:
Because angry people often believe that they have been threatened or harmed, the justification for harming the transgressor is built in. Any anger experience or any anger-motivated aggressive actions a person takes to conserve his or her threatened resources or repel the transgressor are ‘‘justified.’’ Even thoughts about revenge and ‘‘getting even’’ include themes of justification. Angry people are always right. Their anger is righteous. The revenge they wreak is deserved. Their hatred or disdain of others is earned.
Of course, I’d want to make the grass grow in a case like Fish’s. Disturbed desire aside, must I quench the thirst of grass with the blood of another individual merely because I irrationally believe I’m justified in doing so?
While it’s okay to admit to oneself when a virtue such as justice has been violated, functional and healthy anger may result when using rationality. Understandably, you may be angry as a result of your belief about someone having murdered a loved one.
Still, emphasis on the correctness of a response to an activating event is a preventative measure in the process of conflict resolution. No amount of ad hoc or post hoc justification would bring back a murdered child when choosing dysfunctional and unhealthy forms of anger.
Therefore, while I couldn’t take ownership of behavior for Fish or some other serial killer, I could practice personal responsibility and accountability for my reaction to unpleasant events. Nevertheless, I realize that some people outright reject rational living in this regard.
In fact, when discussing REBT with one person who’s known me for just under two decades – prior to when I learned of REBT – in no uncertain terms she told me, “Sometimes, ya just gotta take it there!” In other words, she believes there are some occasions in which one must behave violently.
Given that perspective, rage, hostility, aggression, or violence is a willful choice while righteous indignation has little utility in this regard. If one deliberately chooses self-disturbance, then whatever A-C consequence of such behavior may occur is likely warranted (e.g., incarceration).
Ultimately, clinical dysfunctional anger (i.e., rage, hostility, aggression, violence, etc.) interferes with goal-directed behavior. Because I have a goal to never again view the inside of a jail or prison cell (if I can help it), then I choose clinically functional anger.
Likewise, I’m rational enough to know that I can’t resurrect a child through the murder of another person. Therefore, I choose righteous indignation (healthy negative emotion) over rage, hostility, aggression, and violence (unhealthy negative emotion).
Although I truly hope that no one ever murders my former stepdaughter, I understand that it isn’t objectively true that she shouldn’t suffer such an outcome. Just because I desire for unpleasant events not to occur doesn’t mean that they absolutely won’t result.
Thus, I envision functional versus dysfunctional anger occurring if such an event is brought to my attention. As such, REBT could be enough to keep the monster at bay.
Given the rational framework outlined herein, through use of an actual historical figure about whom I’ve cared, I aim to have illustrated how righteous indignation is an achievable outcome. Personally, this result is preferable to rage, hostility, and aggression.
What are your thoughts regarding this matter? Are you – like some people with whom I’ve shared this information – inclined to reject rational living and instead opt to self-disturb into murderous fits of violence? For your sake, I hope not.
If you’re looking for a provider who works to help you understand how thinking impacts physical, mental, emotional, and behavioral elements of your life—helping you to sharpen your critical thinking skills, I invite you to reach out today by using the contact widget on my website.
As a psychotherapist, I’m pleased to help people with an assortment of issues ranging from anger (hostility, rage, and aggression) to relational issues, adjustment matters, trauma experience, justice involvement, attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder, anxiety and depression, and other mood or personality-related matters.
At Hollings Therapy, LLC, serving all of Texas, I aim to treat clients with dignity and respect while offering a multi-lensed approach to the practice of psychotherapy and life coaching. My mission includes: Prioritizing the cognitive and emotive needs of clients, an overall reduction in client suffering, and supporting sustainable growth for the clients I serve. Rather than simply helping you to feel better, I want to help you get better!
Deric Hollings, LPC, LCSW
Photo credit (edited), fair use
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