A number of years ago, I was contacted by a concerned mother in regard to her adult-aged son. Having left her care not long before the telephonic consultation, the freshman in college apparently was spending more time gaming than he devoted to his studies.
The mother expressed that she would pay for mental, emotional, and behavioral health care services as long as I could convince her son to turn away from online games and satisfy her expectations. There was a perverse incentive for me to address her son’s “abnormal” behavior.
Had I been a psychotherapist of the unethical variety, I could’ve received payment for going against the prospective male client’s self-determined and autonomous approach to life. However, I’m not that sort of therapist.
After a brief discussion about personal agency, free will, and humanism, the mother expressed disappointment with my decision not to treat or manage her son’s reported symptoms of so-called “game addiction.” Alas, not everyone is a proper fit for the services I provide.
In any case, I have little doubt that she hung up the phone and called another potential therapist. As well, I don’t imagine that the mother was unable to find a psychotherapist who was willing to pathologize her son’s purported behavior.
Pathology is something considered abnormal, or which relates to the structural and functional deviations from the normal that constitute disease or that characterize a particular disease. As an example, coprophagia (the ingestion of feces) is a pathological condition. It’s abnormal.
Thus, pathologizing relates to viewing or characterizing something as medically or psychologically abnormal. If you eat your own doo doo, your behavior goes against the norm—a pattern or trait taken to be typical in the behavior of a social group.
While there’s a proper place and context for pathology, pathologizing also has a different meaning in regard to stigmatization. This occurs when people treat others differently in relation to a symptom or categorization which would otherwise be used to address pathology.
For instance, the aforementioned mother who contacted me so that I would essentially indoctrinate, reeducate, or perform some sort of digital conversion therapy to make gamers averse to gaming used a stigmatized categorization in regard to online gamers.
Per the mother’s account, her son wasn’t unhappy, neglectful of his activities of daily living, or isolating to an abnormal degree when compared to his age group. Likewise, there was no reported clinically significant symptom that suggested mental illness or disorderly conduct.
He was merely free from her immediate reach, living in a dorm, playing online games with his friends, and earning A’s and B’s instead of appeasing her demand for straight A’s. Perhaps his mom could’ve benefited from Rational Emotional Behavior Therapy (REBT) intervention.
Aside from gaming, I’ve encountered pathologizing behavior in regard to intimate partner relationships (e.g., someone who rejects you is deemed a “narcissist”) and substance use/abuse/dependence (e.g., someone who uses cannabis is called a “druggie”).
Also, I’ve observed men pathologized for opting to physically train (i.e., “gym bros”), women pathologized for choosing not to have children (i.e., “you got no eggs”), and kids pathologized for valuing parasocial relationships (i.e., “people on social media aren’t real friends”).
Even within the field of mental, emotional, and behavioral health, pathologizing occurs. According to one source:
In the case of mental illness, one symptom can often be lumped in with a larger diagnosis. Unfortunately, this also often results in the reliance on medications, which even professionals in the medical community have been guilty of in recent years.
Perhaps one of the most common instances of pathologizing occurs in regard to how people in Western versus Eastern societies treat the process of grief. “Oh, your loved one died seven months ago and you’re still sad? You have prolonged grief disorder,” a therapist may claim.
“You’ve taken medication for attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder? I don’t believe that’s even a real condition,” a social worker, who I once dated, told me. Aside from these examples, one source highlights how people can also pathologize themselves by stating:
If you’ve ever jumped to diagnose yourself or others based on a symptom or preconceived notion you have, this is known as pathologizing. You may have said “I’m too emotional” about yourself because you cry more than others you know or made an assumption about a person’s mental health condition based on certain stereotypes.
TikTok, X, Instagram, and other social media platforms are chock-full of pathologizing information. In my role as a psychotherapist, I do a fair amount of de-pathologizing through use of psychoeducation to counter the nonsense to which clients are exposed on socials.
Much like the aforementioned mother, who was under the misperception that her son was mentally ill for spending more time playing video games than she otherwise preferred, I find that addressing instances of pathologizing allows for a moment to educate about the field in which I work.
If you love enjoys online gaming, or has expressed side effects such as joy and pleasure in relation to online gaming, there is help available. I offer REBT services so that you can stop disturbing yourself about others who experience positive and healthy emotions.
If you’re looking for a provider who works to help you understand how thinking impacts physical, mental, emotional, and behavioral elements of your life—helping you to sharpen your critical thinking skills, I invite you to reach out today by using the contact widget on my website.
As a psychotherapist, I’m pleased to help people with an assortment of issues ranging from anger (hostility, rage, and aggression) to relational issues, adjustment matters, trauma experience, justice involvement, attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder, anxiety and depression, and other mood or personality-related matters.
At Hollings Therapy, LLC, serving all of Texas, I aim to treat clients with dignity and respect while offering a multi-lensed approach to the practice of psychotherapy and life coaching. My mission includes: Prioritizing the cognitive and emotive needs of clients, an overall reduction in client suffering, and supporting sustainable growth for the clients I serve. Rather than simply helping you to feel better, I want to help you get better!
Deric Hollings, LPC, LCSW
References:
Cox, J. (2022, October 7). What is pathologizing? PsychCentral. Retrieved from https://psychcentral.com/health/pathologizing
Freepik. (n.d.). Cartoon man wearing vr glasses [Image]. Retrieved from https://www.freepik.com/free-ai-image/cartoon-man-wearing-vr-glasses_126195067.htm#page=2&position=0&from_view=collections&uuid=cf49c54c-78f2-4c24-9e92-48c674799f8c
Hollings, D. (2024, May 23). A humanistic approach to mental health. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/a-humanistic-approach-to-mental-health
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Hollings, D. (2022, March 24). Rational emotive behavior therapy (REBT). Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/rational-emotive-behavior-therapy-rebt
Hollings, D. (2024, May 26). Self-determination and autonomy. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/self-determination-and-autonomy
Hollings, D. (2022, November 1). Self-disturbance. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/self-disturbance
Hollings, D. (2024, March 24). Smartphone and social media addiction. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/smartphone-and-social-media-addiction
Hollings, D. (2024, June 19). Treatment vs. management. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/treatment-vs-management
Loggins, B. (2022, August 5). What is pathologizing? Verywell Mind. Retrieved from https://www.verywellmind.com/what-is-pathologizing-5195097
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