It was during my time in Okinawa, Japan (1997-1999) when I was introduced to the music of French house duo Daft Punk, comprised of Thomas Bangalter and Guy-Manuel de Homem-Christo. To this day, they remain my favorite French electronic dance music (EDM) group.
It was also during that time that I discovered Stardust—a one-time musical collaborative effort consisting of producers Bangalter and Alan Braxe, and vocalist Benjamin Diamond. In 1998, Stardust released their hit track “Music Sounds Better with You.” Per one source:
The lyrics were written by all three members. They wrote more lyrics, but failed to find a way to arrange them and pared the song down to its final form. Diamond felt the final lyrics were “like a mantra ... something everyone could understand”.
Braxe said they were happy with the finished song, feeling they had created something original. He described its repetition and simplicity as “a balance between getting bored and not bored”.
Repetitively, the lyrics state, “Ooh, baby, I feel like the music sounds better with you. Love might bring us back together. I feel so good.” At this point in my life, I’ve lost count of how many times I’ve heard the track. Only recently have I considered examining the lyrics.
When viewed through the lens of Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT), regarding my approach to this psychotherapeutic modality, feelings relate either to emotions (e.g., joy) or bodily sensations (e.g., jittery from a rapid heartrate).
However, stating Diamond “felt” that lyrics to “Music Sounds Better with You” were relatable or expressing Braxe had a “feeling” that Stardust created an original track isn’t representative of feelings. Personally, the words we use matter.
Therefore, there’s a distinction to be drawn between feelings and the experience of thinking, believing, maintaining a hunch, or using any other form of cognitive process. Notably, cognitive processes relate to the function of the brain.
These progressions then influence emotive and sensational processes. Although emotions and sensations are influenced by the brain’s mental process, they typically represent a secondary or tertiary effect of cognitive functioning. Of course, there are some exceptions to this proposal.
For instance, you may awake after a night’s rest feeling angry. Without being able to recall the content of your dream, in the moment of waking you’re upset. In this case, there was likely a cognitive process that influenced your mood. Yet, this was an unconscious experience.
Because you may not be able to clearly identify the primary cognition (belief) that resulted in an emotion (e.g., anger) and bodily sensation (e.g., clenched jaw), it’s logical and reasonable to conclude that there may be some exceptions to the practice of the ABC model used in REBT.
REBT theory maintains that when an unexpected Action occurs and a person uses an irrational Belief about the situation, it’s one’s unhelpful attitude and not the undesirable circumstance that causes unpleasant cognitive, emotive, sensational, and behavioral effects as Consequences.
Rather than remaining self-disturbed, an individual is invited to try Disputation which may lead to an Effective new belief that’s used in place of an unproductive self-narrative. With the ABC model, a person learns to stop needless suffering which is caused by unhelpful assumptions.
If an irrational belief occurs in an unconscious state (i.e., sleep), especially when this assumption isn’t recallable upon waking, there’s no point disputing the attitude that likely caused your unpleasant mood upon waking. Yet, you can challenge beliefs about remaining self-disturbed.
Additionally, a belief-consequence connection may result in a desired outcome that isn’t worth disputing. For instance, in “Music Sounds Better with You,” the lyrics state, “Ooh, baby, I feel like the music sounds better with you.”
Because no feeling was described therein, I propose that a proper assertion would be, “Ooh, baby, I believe that the music sounds better with you.” Because of this Belief, the vocalist then experiences joy (Consequence).
When feeling joy, is it worth disputing the belief that led to a pleasant experience? Since informally practicing life coaching since 1991, and formally working as a psychotherapist since 2011, I’ve yet to have someone complain about joy. Is joy a problem for you? It isn’t for me.
Ultimately, I appreciate that Stardust dropped a classic track and essentially dipped thereafter. Even if one were to consider the trio’s contribution to EDM as little more than a one-hit wonder, in my humble opinion, it was a wonderful wonder which I continue to cherish.
Herein, I’ve addressed a minor quibble with colloquial use of the word “feel” (and derivatives thereunto), because I maintain that words have meaning. In particular, using an ABC model perspective, I’ve highlighted the utility of proper word usage in regard to one’s mood.
Noteworthy, in the Stardust song Diamond states, “I feel so good.” Joy is typically considered a “good” or positive feeling. In this case, Diamond doesn’t misuse the word “feel,” because substituting a word relating to a cognitive process wouldn’t make much sense.
For example, it’d be nonsensical to say, “I think so good when believing that the music sounds better with you.” Alternatively, it makes sense to instead express, “I feel so good when believing that the music sounds better with you.” Thus, Diamond’s word use was partially correct.
If this psychoeducational lesson was something you found helpful, then I invite you to check out other blog content that I’ve posted. After reading several entries, you may begin to identify self-disturbing patterns on your own. If you’d like more information about REBT, I’m here to assist.
If you’re looking for a provider who tries to work to help you understand how thinking impacts physical, mental, emotional, and behavioral elements of your life, I invite you to reach out today by using the contact widget on my website.
As the world’s foremost EDM-influenced REBT psychotherapist—promoting content related to EDM, I’m pleased to try to help people with an assortment of issues from anger (hostility, rage, and aggression) to relational issues, adjustment matters, trauma experience, justice involvement, attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder, anxiety and depression, and other mood or personality-related matters.
At Hollings Therapy, LLC, serving all of Texas, I aim to treat clients with dignity and respect while offering a multi-lensed approach to the practice of psychotherapy and life coaching. My mission includes: Prioritizing the cognitive and emotive needs of clients, an overall reduction in client suffering, and supporting sustainable growth for the clients I serve. Rather than simply trying to help you to feel better, I want to try to help you get better!
Deric Hollings, LPC, LCSW
References:
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Fandom. (n.d.). Stardust (artist). Retrieved from https://french-house.fandom.com/wiki/Stardust_(Artist)
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