Minding Your Circle
- Deric Hollings
- 4 days ago
- 5 min read
As Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT) is informed by Stoic philosophy, this blog entry is part of an ongoing series regarding a book entitled The Daily Stoic: 366 Meditations on Wisdom, Perseverance, and the Art of Living by Ryan Holiday and Stephen Hanselman.
According to Epictetus, “We control our reasoned choice and all acts that depend on that moral will. What’s not under our control are the body and any of its parts, our possessions, parents, siblings, children, or country—anything with which we might associate” (page 27).
When using psychoeducational lessons with people in regard to Stoic philosophy, which is interwoven into REBT theory, I introduce the concept of the circles of control, influence, and concern, as well as the area of no concern. It’s a relatively straightforward matter.
The sphere of control encompasses only oneself, the sphere of influence encapsulates elements which may be subject to one’s sway, the sphere of concern engrosses most matters one can imagine, and the area of no concern relates to all content which isn’t yet imagined.
Helpfully, authors of The Daily Stoic state that “a wise person knows what’s inside their circle of control and what is outside of it” (page 27). When teaching lessons in this regard, I include that an individual has control over some (though not all) bodily functions.
As an example, I’m controlling my fingers so that I may type this blogpost. This admission stands in disaccord with Epictetus’ proposal that people don’t control their bodies. As well, authors of The Daily Stoic state (page 27):
According to the Stoics, the circle of control contains just one thing: YOUR MIND. That’s right, even your physical body isn’t completely within the circle. After all, you could be struck with a physical illness or impairment at any moment. You could be traveling in a foreign country and be thrown in jail.
I don’t require imagination about imprisonment or detention in order to refute this claim. After all, I’ve written about the fact that I was twice detained in the Naval Consolidated Brig Miramar and once in the Travis Country Jail. (None of my physical detentions resulted from adjudication.)

Photo credit (edited), fair use
Although my stay in the latter was only for mere hours, detention in the former was less than a month. During that time, I controlled the utensils used to feed myself, hands used to clean myself, legs used to walk from place to place, and arms used to perform pushups in my cell.
It’s absurd to propose that I didn’t maintain control of my body even though other entities had direct influence upon my inability to move outside of the aforementioned facilities. I was in control of both my mind and body (though admittedly to a limited degree).
Granted, with only the power of my mind, I couldn’t stop my heart from beating, skin from regulating the temperature of my body, or automatic blinking of my eyes—at least not to any significant degree—so I maintained control of only a limited part of my bodily functions.
Nevertheless, I maintain that within the circle of control an individual can manipulate some bodily behavior. Still, I can appreciate that authors of The Daily Stoic draw a distinction regarding matters of control to express the following point (page 27):
While everyone else is running around with a list of responsibilities a mile long—things they’re not actually responsible for—you’ve got just that one-item list. You’ve got just one thing to manage: your choices, your will, your mind. So mind it.
I count three things to manage: choices, will, and mind—not merely one. In any case, I comprehend the interpreted message. Rather than self-disturbing with irrational beliefs about how much control you think you have, perhaps you should focus on what you actually control.
If you’re looking for a provider who tries to work to help understand how thinking impacts physical, mental, emotional, and behavioral elements of your life—helping you to sharpen your critical thinking skills, I invite you to reach out today by using the contact widget on my website.
As a psychotherapist, I’m pleased to try to help people with an assortment of issues ranging from anger (hostility, rage, and aggression) to relational issues, adjustment matters, trauma experience, justice involvement, attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder, anxiety and depression, and other mood or personality-related matters.
At Hollings Therapy, LLC, serving all of Texas, I aim to treat clients with dignity and respect while offering a multi-lensed approach to the practice of psychotherapy and life coaching. My mission includes: Prioritizing the cognitive and emotive needs of clients, an overall reduction in client suffering, and supporting sustainable growth for the clients I serve. Rather than simply trying to help you to feel better, I want to try to help you get better!
Deric Hollings, LPC, LCSW
References:
Daily Stoic. (n.d.). Translating the Stoics: An interview with “The Daily Stoic” co-author Stephen Hanselman. Retrieved from https://dailystoic.com/stephen-hanselman-interview/
Holiday, R. and Hanselman, S. (2016). The daily stoic: 366 meditations on wisdom, perseverance, and the art of living. Penguin Random House LLC. Retrieved from https://www.pdfdrive.com/the-daily-stoic-366-meditations-on-wisdom-perseverance-and-the-art-of-living-d61378067.html
Hollings, D. (2022, May 17). Circle of concern. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/circle-of-concern
Hollings, D. (2024, July 11). Concern and no concern. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/concern-and-no-concern
Hollings, D. (2023, April 22). Control. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/control
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San Diego Union-Tribune. (2016, September 2). Navy unveils new brig at MCAS Miramar [Image]. Retrieved from https://www.sandiegouniontribune.com/2011/02/11/navy-unveils-new-brig-at-mcas-miramar/
Wikipedia. (n.d.). Epictetus. Retrieved from https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Epictetus
Wikipedia. (n.d.). Ryan Holiday. Retrieved from https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ryan_Holiday
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