Just Wait'n

[DISCLAIMER]

On the deluxe edition of his 2011 album Beach Cruiser, rapper Glasses Malone released the track “Just Wait’n”. Lyrics address the rapper’s observation of the impermanent and uncertain aspect of life while declaring that he’s “just wait’n on the world to change.”

Sometimes it may seem as though the undesirable situation in which you find yourself will never change, and as if you may die while waiting for the moment to pass. It’s during times when wait’n on the world to change which you may find that you self-disturb. I’ll explain what I mean.

Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT) uses the ABC model to illustrate that when an undesirable Action occurs and you Believe unhelpful narratives about the event, it’s your unfavorable assumptions and not the occurrence itself that cause unpleasant Consequences.

As an example, in “Just Wait’n,” Glasses Malone describes jealous-fueled behavior in which a person attempts to take his life (Action). During such an event one may Believe, “I must never die and it would be terrible if I did, so I can’t stand this worthless person trying to kill me!”

These unfavorable Beliefs may then lead to unpleasant Consequences of a cognitive, emotive, sensational, or behavioral variety. For instance, one may experience ruminating thoughts about peril, fear, jitteriness throughout the body, and urinary incontinence.

Addressing how people upset themselves with unhelpful attitudes, the ABC model incorporates Disputation of these unproductive assumptions in order to explore Effective new beliefs. Rather than experiencing unpleasant Consequences of disturbance, one can merely tolerate distress.

After all, it seems appropriate to endure distress during a moment when someone is trying to kill you. Still, you could make the situation far more unpleasant than it already is by adopting unproductive Beliefs about an undesirable Action.

In “Just Wait’n,” Glasses Malone achieves what he presumably considers an Effective new belief by concluding, “Ain’t a hater breathin’ worth life in the pen, ‘less he’s fuckin’ wit’ the fam.” Depending on applied logic and reason, defense of one’s in-group is arguably rational.

In any case, I appreciate that Glasses Malone addresses how transient and indeterminate the process of life is. Just wait’n on things to change to an idealistic version of reality envisioned only within one’s deluded mind may take a while. You got time for that? I don’t.

Thus, I actively practice the ABC model as an abortive strategy regarding self-disturbance. I also use unconditional acceptance (UA) in the form of unconditional self-acceptance, unconditional other-acceptance, and unconditional life-acceptance as a preventive measure.

When considering the helpful practice of UA, another song comes to mind. On his 1964 album The Times They Are a-Changin’, singer-songwriter Bob Dylan released the song “The Times They Are a-Changin’”. Regarding the track, one source states:

Ever since its release, the song has been influential to people’s views on society, with critics noting the universal lyrics as contributing to the song’s lasting message of change […] Dylan recalled writing the song as a deliberate attempt to create an anthem of change for the moment […] Less than a month after Dylan recorded the song, President Kennedy was assassinated on November 22, 1963. The next night, Dylan opened a concert with “The Times They Are a-Changin’”.

People continuously die. From unspecified individuals described in Glasses Malone’s song to people of notoriety, such as President Kennedy; everyone eventually dies. One moment we’re here, the times they are a-changin’, and then we’re gone.

While perhaps most people experience natural distress when contemplating their own deaths, many people self-disturb about their inescapable end of life through use of unaccommodating attitudes about death. Perhaps such individuals could apply Dylan’s preventative UA outlook:

The line, it is drawn, the curse, it is cast

The slow one now will later be fast

As the present now will later be past

The order is rapidly fadin’

And the first one now will later be last

For the times, they are a-changin’

Helpful practice of UA accepts that the now will one day become then. You’re here now, yet then you won’t be. As you’re just wait’n for a Dylan-esque ‘first one now to later be last,’ how about changin’ your self-disturbin’ beliefs, because attempts to change the world may be in vain?

If you’re looking for a provider who tries to work to help you understand how thinking impacts physical, mental, emotional, and behavioral elements of your life, I invite you to reach out today by using the contact widget on my website.

As the world’s foremost hip hop-influenced REBT psychotherapist, I’m pleased to try to help people with an assortment of issues from anger (hostility, rage, and aggression) to relational issues, adjustment matters, trauma experience, justice involvement, attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder, anxiety and depression, and other mood or personality-related matters.

At Hollings Therapy, LLC, serving all of Texas, I aim to treat clients with dignity and respect while offering a multi-lensed approach to the practice of psychotherapy and life coaching. My mission includes: Prioritizing the cognitive and emotive needs of clients, an overall reduction in client suffering, and supporting sustainable growth for the clients I serve. Rather than simply trying to help you to feel better, I want to try to help you get better!

Deric Hollings, LPC, LCSW

Photo credit, fair use

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