Photo credit, property of Universal Pictures, fair use
When I was a child, I watched the film Cry-Baby (1990) and laughed quite a bit at its depictions of histrionics—theatrical performances; deliberate display of emotion for effect. Describing the film, one source states:
Allison is a “square” good girl who has decided she wants to be bad and falls hard for Cry-Baby Walker, a Greaser (or “Drape” in John Waters parlance). Spoofing Elvis movies and Juvenile Delinquency scare films of the ‘50s, this movie follows the adventures of Cry-Baby who, though he is sent to juvie, is determined to cross class (and taste) boundaries to get Allison back.
Part of what I found so funny about the film was that Cry-Baby was illustrated as being so tough that he could shed only a single tear. He was capable emoting, though a hyperbolized form of Stoicism prevented Cry-Baby from becoming too irrationally emotive.
Aside from having defined “histrionics” herein, the singular form “histrionic” is described as being deliberately affected: overly dramatic or emotional; of or relating to actors, acting, or the theater. This is different than histrionic personality disorder (HPD) which is defined as:
[A] personality disorder characterized by a pattern of long-term (rather than episodic) self-dramatization in which individuals draw attention to themselves, crave activity and excitement, overreact to minor events, experience angry outbursts, and are prone to manipulative suicide threats and gestures, included in DSM-IV-TR, DSM-5, and DSM-5-TR under the broader category of cluster B personality disorders.
Such individuals appear to others to be shallow, egocentric, inconsiderate, vain, demanding, dependent, and helpless. The disorder was formerly known as hysterical personality disorder.
I once dated a woman who exhibited traits of undiagnosed HPD and it was a disastrous intimate partner relationship experience. Nevertheless, her personality disorder traits weren’t merely a result of histrionics. This distinction is worth noting in relation to the current blogpost.
Recently, actress Selena Gomez received criticism regarding a video she apparently posted concerning President of the United States (U.S.) Donald Trump’s fulfilment of a campaign promise to deport thousands or potentially millions of people who entered the country illegally.
As a matter of full disclosure regarding my stance on this matter, I stated in a blogpost entitled Magic Dirt:
Merely supporting the process of mass immigration may allow a naïve individual to irrationally assume that one has behaved in a morally upstanding manner, because transferring a person from an underdeveloped nation to a developed country can somehow magically allow an immigrant to flourish.
However, this form of woo-woo nonsense denies the influence of genetics, biology, personality, culture, values, and other elements which comprise complex systems which create human beings. Concerning this form of foolhardy reasoning, I echo a Gad Saad quote expressed in my blogpost entitled Unicornia:
[T]hat doesn’t mean that spreading a message—“Love will conquer all,” “Love is love,” “Kindness to all,” “The only way we’re going to solve all problems is through greater kindness”—that’s not a realistic, adult position to take. That makes you a three-year-old living in Unicornia, utopia. That’s not how an adult thinks.
Although I’m no fan of the U.S. Department of Justice, I acknowledge that 1911. 8 U.S.C. 1325 of the Criminal Resource Manual specifically addresses unlawful entry into the U.S. It’s against the law to enter U.S. borders without permission, documentation, or in violation of policy.
No matter the shortcomings of Joe Biden and his administration to enforce applicable laws over the past four years, it’s a matter of Unicornia-esque belief to maintain that non-U.S. citizens have a fundamental right to enter and occupy our nation. Belief to the contrary is irrational.
Moreover, such unproductive beliefs cause histrionics in the form of self-disturbed bawling to millions or potentially billions of people across the globe when bitching, whining, moaning, and complaining about action from the Trump administration to secure our borders.
Whingeing of this sort serves as little more than an illogical and unreasonable appeal to emotion. Besides, not everyone will readily adopt an irrational argument simply because a person sheds a single tear like Cry-Baby or many tears like Gomez.
Regarding the latter, one source states, “After removing the post, Gomez shared a message that read: ‘Apparently it’s not OK to show empathy for people.” Concerning empathy, I stated in a blogpost entitle On Empathy:
[E]mpathy may not be the best—or even an appropriate—practice I may use when working with clients.
Do I care about other people? Of course. Do I use rational compassion with my clients? Certainly. Do I think what my clients think, feel what they feel, or truly understand their unique circumstances? Absolutely not.
Colloquially, empathy is defined as the action of understanding, being aware of, being sensitive to, and vicariously experiencing the feelings, thoughts, and experience of another. I argue that it’s impossible to “vicariously” experience the cognitive and emotive happening of another.
To suggest otherwise is Unicornia-esque nonsense. Although one may display histrionics by performativity acting out the imagined experience of suffering, histrionic displays of emotions like this aren’t the same as actually feeling what another feels – or so-called “empathy.”
Furthermore, an actor—one who behaves as if acting a part—performing the behavior of one who suffers is something I think is worth questioning. Why broadcast histrionics via social media? Wouldn’t some level of Stoicism, though not of a hyperbolic variety, be more useful?
While I don’t unhelpfully maintain that Gomez shouldn’t, mustn’t, or oughtn’t to have shed tears on full display to the world, one wonders about what perverse incentives may or may not have played a driving role in such behavior. Does that sort of theatrical performance move you?
Personally, histrionics regarding the current immigration situation echo within my mind the lyrics sang by Cry-Baby Walker in Cry-Baby, as he stated, “You cry a baby cry a baby cry baby cry.” As such, I’m unmoved by irrational appeals to emotion. In fact, I find them off-putting.
Perhaps you read this and ask yourself, “How is it that a social worker rejects the notion of empathy, especially regarding refuges, migrants, immigrants, or those who’ve crossed the U.S. border in pursuit of a better life, yet without proper documentation? Doesn’t Deric have a heart?”
Unlike many of my colleagues in the field for care of mental, emotional, and behavioral health, I don’t value emotionality over rationality. From a logical and reasonable perspective, I use rational compassion rather than using empathy – an impossible phenomenon to say the least.
Ultimately, you can upset yourself with unfavorable beliefs about Trump’s actions toward illegal immigration. If you choose this option “you cry a baby cry a baby cry baby cry.” Bear in mind that irrational appeals to emotion won’t necessarily persuade others toward your position.
Still, one wonders if Gomez and others in support of her stance on illegal immigration shed tears when Barack Obama’s administration reportedly “deported more than 3 million people.” Where were the histrionics then?
So far, regarding Trump’s approach, one may suggest, “Gotta pump those numbers up. Those are rookie numbers in this racket.” Perhaps you irrationally believe that this comical statement causes you anger, disappointment, frustration, or sorrow. Are you ready to display histrionics?
If you choose to self-disturb, because I advocate concern for my own countrymen and women before trying to help the world – and I do so using humor when making a point, then so be it. I’d prefer that you didn’t, though it’s your life to live. (Make sure that you film your meltdown for histrionically theatrical effect.)
If you’re looking for a provider who tries to work to help understand how thinking impacts physical, mental, emotional, and behavioral elements of your life—helping you to sharpen your critical thinking skills, I invite you to reach out today by using the contact widget on my website.
As a psychotherapist, I’m pleased to try to help people with an assortment of issues ranging from anger (hostility, rage, and aggression) to relational issues, adjustment matters, trauma experience, justice involvement, attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder, anxiety and depression, and other mood or personality-related matters.
At Hollings Therapy, LLC, serving all of Texas, I aim to treat clients with dignity and respect while offering a multi-lensed approach to the practice of psychotherapy and life coaching. My mission includes: Prioritizing the cognitive and emotive needs of clients, an overall reduction in client suffering, and supporting sustainable growth for the clients I serve. Rather than simply trying to help you to feel better, I want to try to help you get better!
Deric Hollings, LPC, LCSW
References:
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Chain, B. (2025, January 28). Selena Gomez hits back at Senate candidate who called for her to be ‘deported’ for sympathizing with migrants. Daily Mail. Retrieved from https://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-14332479/Selena-Gomez-Senate-candidate-deported.html
Criminal Resource Manual. (n.d.). 1911. 8 U.S.C. 1325 -- Unlawful entry, failure to depart, fleeing immigration checkpoints, marriage fraud, commercial enterprise fraud. U.S. Department of Justice. Retrieved from https://www.justice.gov/archives/jm/criminal-resource-manual-1911-8-usc-1325-unlawful-entry-failure-depart-fleeing-immigration
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